You’re doing everything right. So why do you feel so empty?

On paper, your life looks good. You have the job, the family, and the responsibilities. You get out of bed, you show up to work, and you smile when you’re supposed to.

But underneath the surface, it feels like you are moving through quicksand. Everything takes twice as much effort as it used to. You might feel a deep sense of loneliness even when you are with people, or a nagging feeling that you are just "going through the motions" without actually living.

You might tell yourself, "I have no reason to be depressed. Others have it worse." But minimizing your pain doesn't make it go away; it just makes you feel more alone.

At Intentional Living Psychotherapy, I don't see your pain as a weakness. I see it as a signal that something in your life or history needs attention, care, and a safe place to heal.

A woman in a black blazer and light blue jeans sitting on a wooden chair in a minimalist setting, smiling with her head resting on her hand.

What Does Depression Feel Like?

Depression isn't always about staying in bed all day. Especially for high-functioning individuals or those from immigrant families where "resilience" is mandatory, depression can be quiet and hidden. It might look like:

Emotional Numbness: You don’t feel "sad" as much as you feel nothing. Things that used to bring you joy now feel flat or pointless.
Chronic Exhaustion: You wake up tired. Your limbs feel heavy, and even small tasks like answering emails or folding laundry feel overwhelming.
Irritability & Anger: You find yourself snapping at your partner or kids over small things, then feeling guilty immediately after.
The "Inner Critic": You have a harsh voice in your head telling you that you are lazy, ungrateful, or falling behind.
Isolation: You withdraw from friends and family because pretending to be "okay" takes too much energy.

If this sounds familiar, you are not broken. You are carrying a heavy load, and you deserve support to set it down.

Psychodynamic therapy sessions helping clients in Kitchener find connection and joy after depression

Am I Showing Signs of Depression?

Depression can look different for everyone. While some people can’t get out of bed, others (especially high-achievers) push through the day while feeling empty inside. If you have been experiencing these signs for more than two weeks, you may be dealing with depression.

The Spark is Gone

You no longer find pleasure in the things that used to light you up. Whether it is your hobbies, socializing with friends, or intimacy with your partner, everything feels like a chore. You aren't necessarily sad; you just feel "flat" or indifferent.
Constant Exhaustion

Depression is physically draining. You might wake up feeling tired even after a full night's sleep, or feel like your limbs are made of lead. You may find yourself sleeping too much (hypersomnia) or lying awake at night with a restless mind (insomnia).
Changes in Appetite & Weight

You might notice you have lost all interest in food, leading to unintentional weight loss. Alternatively, you may find yourself "emotional eating" or craving comfort foods to try and fill the emotional void, leading to weight gain.
Brain Fog & Indecision

It feels like your mind is clouded. You might struggle to focus on work tasks, forget simple details, or feel paralyzed when trying to make even small decisions. This "cognitive slowing" is a very common, yet often overlooked, symptom of depression.
Overwhelming Guilt or Hopelessness

You carry a heavy sense of worthlessness. You might fixate on past mistakes, feel like you are letting your family down, or believe that you are a burden to others. A voice in your head might tell you that things will never get better.
Intrusive or Dark Thoughts

You may have recurring thoughts about death or dying. This doesn't always mean you have a plan to end your life; it can sometimes sound like, "Everyone would be better off without me," or a passive wish to just go to sleep and not wake up.

How We Heal Depression Together

I move beyond just "positive thinking" or generic advice. Using a trauma-informed and culturally sensitive lens, I help you understand the root of your depression so we can create lasting change.

Depression can be an echo of the past. It may be linked to unprocessed grief, childhood emotional neglect, or the pressure of living up to family expectations that don't align with who you are. We will explore your story to understand why you feel this way, giving you the insight to break generational patterns and write your own narrative.
Depression often feels like a "shutdown" mechanism. In IFS, we view this numbness not as a failure, but as a protective part of you trying to shield you from pain or overwhelm. Instead of fighting this part, we get to know it. By understanding why your system has hit the "brakes," we can gently help it feel safe enough to engage with life again.
Depression lies and tells you that you are a burden to others. This can create distance in your relationships right when you need connection the most. I help you navigate these feelings so you can let your loved ones in, turning your relationships into a source of comfort rather than a source of guilt.

Therapy That Fits Your Life

I know that reaching out is the hardest step. I strive to make the process as warm and accessible as possible.

In-Person in Kitchener-Waterloo:

For those who crave a physical safe space, my office is located at 900 Guelph Street. It’s a quiet, welcoming environment where you can leave the world at the door.
Online Therapy Across Ontario:

If you have a busy schedule or feel safer in your own home, I offer secure video sessions. This is a great option for clients in Toronto, Brampton, or surrounding areas.
Culturally Inclusive:

You shouldn't have to explain your culture to your therapist. I hold space for the nuances of your identity, faith, and family dynamics, ensuring you feel seen in your wholeness.

Meet Ruba

Finding the energy to start therapy when you are depressed is incredibly hard. I want to make it as easy and safe as possible for you.

As a Registered Psychotherapist (Qualifying), I specialize in working with individuals who feel "stuck." My practice, Intentional Living Psychotherapy, is built on the belief that you don't have to sacrifice your own well-being to make others happy.

I get the Cultural Context: If your depression is tied to family duty, immigration stress, or identity, you won't have to spend sessions explaining the nuance to me.
No Toxic Positivity: I won't tell you to "just look on the bright side." I will sit with you in the dark until we find the light together.
A Pace That Works for You: We will move at a speed that feels safe for your nervous system—never pushing, always inviting.

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How Therapy Works

1. Understanding Your Story

In our first session, I’ll learn about your experiences, challenges, and goals at a pace that feels comfortable.
2. Creating a Personalized Plan

Together, we’ll build a personalized plan with strategies to help you heal, grow, and navigate life’s challenges
3. Doing the Work

Through reflection and new skills, you’ll gain insight, break patterns, and make meaningful changes in your life.
4. Tracking Progress

We’ll adjust as needed, celebrate growth, and ensure therapy continues to meet your evolving needs.
5. Moving Forward

When you’re ready, we’ll explore what’s next, whether that’s reducing sessions, setting new goals, or confidently moving on.